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+#things maniacal four-year-olds do to give you a heart attack...
+# author Katherine von Duyke:
+c(
+"I don't love you anymore!",
+"Runs into traffic...",
+"approaches outlet with fork",
+"attempts to brush teeth with neosporin",
+"loads your iphone into Dishwasher",
+"Threatens to call protective services if you don't buy X",
+"Tells big boy doewn street that you will beat him up",
+"Tells mother of big boy down the street you will beat him up",
+"Screams, raises pitch and volume, screams again, repeat",
+"Tells mom when dad attempts to discipline",
+"Tells dad when mom attempts to discipline",
+"Calls 911 to complain that he/she didn't get dessert",
+"Shoves beads up nose, after shoving toys up nose",
+"Shows pocketful of pilfered candy after leaving store",
+"Moons traffic from back of van",
+"Asks for water after lights out for the 5th time",
+"Hits you in the face",
+"Hits you in the balls",
+"Takes your cell phone while on an important call",
+"Screams loudly while you drag him/her out of store",
+"Screams and wakes up baby",
+"Screams for the umpteenth time",
+"Did I mention screams?",
+"Goes down slide backwards standing up",
+"Runs out of the house naked"
+)